Adios, amigos

Hello

and goodbye, tbh.
i'm going on my cruise around the caribbean! :)
score.
see you later, suckers ;)


Yours with sun,
Hannah xxx

Hello

guess who got their pinna pierced!?


yeah. that would be me.


Yours with a needle in the ear,
Hannah xxx

right.

Hello

3 snow days.
impressive :)

well, college is all good - loads of work, but it's fine..
Andy and i are good - back on track. Emily's back, but it's fine...
sort of.
i'm just trying to not let it get to me because that causes argument.

I had a very nice afternoon/evening with Andy today - went out for meal and chilled and stuff..
was nice :)

god i'm gonna miss him when i go away :/

i'm quite excited about this holiday actually.. :) i know i'm gonna miss andy like hell, but it'll be good i think. plus i need sun. m skin is looking DREADFUL. winter seriously hates my face :/

Yours with spotsbutloveaswell,
Hannah xxx

don't know why.

Hello

so, i don't know why i write these.. i don't keep up to date with them often, i never read other people's cause i don't know how, and i only do it when i want to share something but there's no one else i can tell, really.

there's nothing big to update you on.

Andy and I are good. i know i said we argued last time, but i think we're pretty much sorted now - or we're heading that way. This evening was well nice - kisses, cuddles, just general love all the time. i love him to bits :)

but then my parents annoy me just by being around tbh.
my brother's a fucking suck-up to them when he knows i'm in an argument with them, and it's bloody annoying.
i just cbf with them. mum still gets pissy if Andy stays past 10:00.
eurgh.

times like this when there's nothing i want more than to move out.
actually, tbh, that's what i want more than anything right now.

i don't tell Andy this, because i know he wants it to, and it annoys him that we can't actually do this, but i really, really want to move out and live with him in a little flat somwhere. i know it's not possible because we can't afford it, and my parent's would freak, and i'm at college and he's at work etc, but i just want it to. gets me down that i'm stuck in this hell hole atm :/

he never reads this, so i'm assuming it's safe for me to write this on here :L

just wish life was simple and money was easy to come by :/
if i worked more, it might be possible, but i have too much college work on :/

Yours with loveandalsowishes,
Hannah xxx

not being funny.

Hello

not being funny, but i don't know what to write.
Andy and I have argued a lot recently - I'm changing to stop that, but now he's starting the arguments. They are cooling off slowly though.

Urrrm, college work. fun.
it's good, collyers. but soo much work.

i HATE work. going to look for a new job ASAP.

want to learn to drive - hating not being 17 :/

friends-wise, all is fine.
things have changed, but everyone does, soo :/

but yeah.

Happy life, in general.

Yours with content,
Hannah xxx

urrm.

Hello

so i left it when i'd left my house for a night, right?

urrrm. well.. not much else has happened tbh.
getting on a bit better with my fam.. not arguing so much.

Andy and I are still going strong.
slept round his house last weekend :)
and yesterday we watched Paranormal Activity 1 to see if he'd wanna see the 2nd one.

well.. when i say 'we' watched it, i mean he watched it and i hid under the duvet with my fingers in my ears.
but he watched the alternative ending which i didn't realise was a lot less scary.

so yeah. i hate that film.

but yeah, friends are good... there's a bit of a problem with one of them. she's not the person she used to be and it's really upsetting but tbh, i've told her and there's nothing else i can do...
she needs to realise that it's not right to act like she does.

But yeah, Andy really is the person that's always there for me atm.
i do love him so much.

it makes me think that all my past relationships really have been for nothing, and maybe meant nothing.. it kinda makes me doubt whether or not i was actually in love before.. i mean, i think i was, but this is a whole new feeling with him, so it makes me feel like i wasn't in love before, know what i mean?

he treats me better than anyone else had before, that's for certain.

Ooooh yay :)<3


Yours with loooooadsofloveandaffection,
Hannah xxx

had to be done.

Hello

so, i keep arguing with the rents. so Saturday night, we had a HUGE fight, so i just left. I went to Andy's. told them where i was going and left. they were NOT happy. quite worried actually.
i felt a bit guilty so i came back last night so i was only out for one night. but still, it helped just to have been out of the house for one night... away from that atmosphere.

dad hates me now though, and i think i'm being ignored.
don't care.
i don't actually need them.

Anyway, that's it really.

just kinda wanted to tell Andy that he has actually completed my life.
I love him more than i ever thought possible, i hope it never ends.
he looked after me so well last night, and i'm so glad i can turn to him about anything, and i can rely on him to look after me when i'm down.
He's actually perfect.
Truly.

Yours with loadsoflove,
Hannah xxx

college!

Hello

oh my, i cannot even begin to explain how much i like Collyers :D
English, French, History and Politics.
wow.
best subjects EVER.

I remember Connor telling me that i'd hate it.
this is me proving him very wrong.
i LOVE it.

especially history and also politics, which i was nervous about, seeing as i knew nothing about politics or anything like that. but it turns out i'm actually not half bad at it :)

Andy and I have argued a few times recently. esp tonight. but he came over just now to say sorry and make up, and we did :) so yeahh, everything's good on that front.
6 months with him soon :) <3

going out for a meal with the girls (and Julien) saturday night; should be good.

urrrrm...
news.. news..news...

work's getting better now.. was Mrs Smith's birthday last week - love her :P

Serena invited me to her Christian group thing on Tuesday, to which i dragged jess along - was basically a free meal and some people ranting about christianity, which, as an Athiest, bored me.

urrrrm.
tbh, i kinda think that's it..
nothing has really happened recently.
college, work, andy..
friends.
ah yes. everyone is fine. making new friends at college. they're all still amazingly wonderful. missing seeing jew and nikki though. :/

urrrm yeah..
arguing with family a bit more again, but that's nothing new..

i think that must be it tbh.
yeah :)

right, night then! :)

Yours with happiness,
Hannah xxx

Update again.

Hello

right, so basically.
benoit came over for like... 5 nights. was nice. bit weird at times but yeah.. i've converted him to drinking tea with milk :)

urrrm, i'm not sure if i wrote it in the last one, but i have a job. I work in a cafe in town called the Merrythought cafe. It's full of little old ladies. it's shit, but it's work.

GCSEs... urrrrm
English lang - B
English lit - B
Maths - B
Science - C
Additional science - C
German - B
R.E. - C
BCS - C
History - A
French - A

so yeah :)
not bad. got the higher grades in things that i'm taking at A level so yeah, all's good :) and i got £500 out of it :)


Andy and i are all good :) we've had the very occasional 'heated discussion', but nothing more and we're getting along very well. I've seen an awful lot of him recently, so that on the days when i don't see him, it feels weird :/

Evie and I are friends again - I saw her when I'd dropped Benoit off at the station, and i just burst into tears and started apologising at her :L poor soul. so yeah, we're all good :)

I also went to Devon to see the famalam.. was boring. but yeah :/

urmm, i've been to Thorpe Park..

I went to London a couple of days ago with the girls to spend my GCSE money on clothes for college, which i did so very successfully. :)

urrm. that really is all the important news i can think of.
if any more occurs tome, i'll let you know.


Yours with boredofthisblog,
Hannah xxx

update.

Hello

so, i've been told to update my blog, so that's what i'm going to do, because, i have to admit, i haven't written in a while.

so, since i last wrote, i've been to Greece with my aunty, uncle and cousin, which was rather lush, i have to admit.
we stayed on an island called Poros, and in a hotel called the Saga hotel, which was run by a lovely lady called Zeffi, who they had stayed with before. we spent most of the time on the beach and pool. i did manage to get myself a nice tan (for me, anyway!)

greek men loved us; everywhere we went we were stared at my men and whistled and beeped and talked to etc. it made us feel rather good ;)
and then on the beach 2 days before we left, some fat, old man asked lydia to put oil on his back so she did, the next day, he asked me to do it as well! he then bought us drinks, which were bought over by the hot beach boy who said, "this is from the boy".
BOY?! he was like 40!! :S eurgh.
he constantly stared.
although that was kinda gross, we had a laugh and got drunk practically EVERY night, bar one.
was fun :)

the week afterwards, Andy booked a week off work (this was last week; commencing 12th).
we went to Worthing, Horsham, Brighton etc. :) then we booked a hotel again, and stayed overnight there on the Tuesday and then went to Brighton :)
was nice, and then on Sunday, we went fishing. was surprisingly fun actually. we caught 3 macrel :) threw them away, though :L poor little buggers.

but yeahh :)
life is dandy.

Nikki slept over last night, and we watched Eclipse in the cinema :)
saw looooads of people there.

and then we came back and had a good ol' bitch about everyone and everything.
a certain person in particular.
incidentally, i hope this particular person is reading this, because you know you're in the wrong and you know you're a dirty little slut, and i don't plan on ever speaking to you again :)

anyway, life is still dandy :)

Andy's over tonight; i've gotta dye his hair :S

Also, benoit's over this Saturday. not sure for how long, but it's gonna be a few nights i think.

Andy's not so happy about it, but i think he understands that i haven't seen him in ages, and i wanted to catch up with him.

so yeah, it's all good :)

it's been over 3 months, and Andy and i haven't properly argued or broken up. it's because we speak a lot to each other about everything that's bothering us :) i'm actually head over heels for him. he is just wonderful, and i have NEVER been treated so well. it's wonderful :)

Yours with loadsoflove,
Hannah xxx

andy pandy :)

Hello

i'm a reb, oh yes i am :)
i slept round his house, and told my rents it was round evie's.
was a nice night, actually.

oh my. i've never been so close to someone so quickly.
this rocks. and we're going out this evening as well.
seriously, i've seen him every day this week.
:)
it's amazing.
he's amazing.
and he spoils me rotten. i love it. but tbh, i don't deserve him.

also, i never call him Andy.
he doesn't have a proper, and neither do i.
it's always 'babe' or 'baby' :)
it's NEVER each other's names unless we're with each other's families :)

so basically, Andy, if you're reading this:
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH :)<3

Yours with looooadsoflove,
Hannah xxx

let me explain.

Hello

so let me explain prom.
it wasn't the night i was hoping for.

first, we all god ready. had our hair done etc. was nice :)
then, the limo didn't turn up.
they'd double booked us, so we got into cars and drove there.
we then got the wrong hotel.

about an hour in, jess needed the loo, so i took her to the loo, and the queue went out the door, so i leaned on my hand on the door.
only, it wasnt on the door, or even on the frame.
it was in the hinge.
so, of course, it being a very heavy door, when it closed on my fingers, i screamed and lost all speech.
jess dragged me over to the teachers and nurses, and i have some hench dent in my fingers.
i was told to be taken to the hospital by Mr Shephard and Miss Farrell. not good.
i was crying at this point, and not just because of the pain, but because i didn't wanna leave prom.

so we drove in mr shephard's mini cooper to Redhill hospital (30 minutes away from prom) and then i was let in right away, told i didn't need stitches and sent back to prom.
but, of course, my dad worried, and came over to see me with an overnight bag, just incase :L
this was just as we'd left the hospital.

so 2 of my fingers were in plaster and the other was black. i had to keep them on 'till tuesday. (tomorrow)

got back to prom, and got lots of sympathy love. :)
had a good rest of evening, and yeah.
danced with duncan and kieran and took loads of pictures :)

me, hannah j, jess, lizzy, charlie, evie and annalise all came back to mine and we all slept in the lounge and ate food :)

so yeah, not the night i'd thought, but at least i'll remember it!

never mind.

everyone looked beautiful though :)

Yours with loveandpain,
Hannah xxx

P.S. i took off the bandages today to see the damage. was quite gross, so i have a normal plaster on my middle finger for the time being. won't look so dramatic for leaver's assembly tomorrow. :)

prom

Hello


PROM
PROM
PROM
PROM
PROM
PROM
PROM
PROM
PROM
PROM
PROM

:D

love life.

Yours with promness,
Hannah xxx

let's think.

Hello

so, i've been thinking about Charlii a lot recently.
not sure why so much really...
but my GOD i miss the girl.
i try not to show people how much i miss her, but when people say 'oh, hannah, you've gone quiet. what's up?', that's what's usually up.

depressing? yeah, i know. i can't help it.

Yours with loveforeverandever,
Hannah xxx

Hello

it's 8:45pm.
i'm going to bed.
don't judge me.

Goodnight.


Yours with tiredness,
Hannah xxx

Mmmmh :/

Hello

So andy and i had an argument..
it wasn't a big as such, but yeahh.. i'm kinda still in a mood, even though it's sorted. but i don't think what he said was entirely true when he apologised...
never mind :/
but i'm going to the rugby club with evie this evening to watch the football, so we'll have a good chat then :)

tomorrow, i'm working for Carrie with Evie for some wedding :S
urrrr...
sunday i'm seeing Andy i believe.
if we've made up properly...

umm... then i don't have another exam until Wednesday, which is German then i'm all done :):)

need a job though, tbh.

but it's okay.. dad bought me more clothes today, on top of the ones my mum bought me the other day :L

Yours with kindofokayness,
Hannah xxx

leave me alone.

Hello

Dear all those who are out to ruin my life:
leave me alone.
i'm happy.
get over it.
you are so miserable all the time.
and you're not going to get anywhere by calling me names.
so get out of my life.
you irritate me.

Yours with thanks,
Hannah xxx

Andy Pandy :)

Hello

LOOOOOOOK :)



it's me and my baby :)
okay so things are going VERYYY well atm.
everything with andy and i couldn't be going any better :)
he's booked a whole week off work for the week after i go to greece, just so he can spend it all with me :)
so i'm a happy chappy.

these exams are stressing me out.
but they're nearly over. so i need to chill.

getting on well with my parents as well atm, tbh :)

just life in general atm, is amazing :)

Yours with lotsandlotsoflove,
Hannah xxx

exams and the usual jizz.

Hello

Situations:

Hannah and Andy: everthing is actually amazing. thing's couldn't be going better and everything works atm. any problems we have, we talk, and sort them out. this is love. oh yes it is. he's amazing and treats me so well. he knows what'll annoy me and what won't. and he already knows me almost as well as jess/connor :) life is good :)

Exams: i don't even realise it, but i'm quite stressed about them. my dad said this morning, 'you're coping quite well, i was half expecting you to be a moody little cow this month, but you're not'. I just said 'yeah i am, just not to you, because you give me money :)' i don't even realise how stressed i am, until i lie down by myself and think about it. or if i get into an argument with someone, i get too stressed, and too upset. i've argued with matt the past couple of nights. one night i just cried because i'm so fed up of everything and everything just piled up, and the other time i just stressed out and yelled a lot. It's the same with connor, when we had that massive argument. it was enormous. i haven't been that upset in a long time, and then andy came down to see me to cheer me up: it worked :) so yeah, i'm stressed. but i try not to show it unless someone does something to annoy me. even something small. then it all just blows up in my face.

Friends: no joke, i hate not spending every day with them. it's like, when i see them, they're not the same people because i'm so used to spending loads of time with them, and then i don't all of a sudden. After these exams, i WILL see them a lot. and i cannot WAIT for prom with them all :)

so yeah, everything's quite good i suppose.
i finish my exams on the 23rd. i have 7 more left :)

Yours with stressandlove,
Hannah xxx

everything is good now :)

Hello

everything's good, basically.
Andy and I are amazing :) i mean seriously..
(i had sex with him, how naughty of me :L)
yeah, and friends are amazing and everything..
Family are irritating, but hey.. what can you do? lol

literally, Andy and I are so good.
He took me out for dinner last night, AGAIN. He treats me too much and tbh, I don't deserve him.
I never actually thought i'd feel this close to anyone again in a loong long time.
but i have and i am.
sounds silly, but i am SO comfortable around him.
literally, it sounds gay, but i can eat properly.. I'm usually quite shy when it comes to eating in front of boys, but with him it's perfectly normal, and it was like that after like.. 2 weeks!
:)
how silly do i sound?
very, is the answer.
but i don't care :)

Also, we rented this hotel a couple of weeks ago...
was such a lovely night :) and yes, the 'deed' was done there ;)
and then we went to Brighton and afterwards, we sunbathed (and fell asleep) in Shoreham on the downs.
i got VERY, VERY sunburnt. couldn't move properly for days... and now i'm peeling realllly savagely.
(n)
was worth it though :)
he's perfect.

Yours with happiness,
Hannah xxx

Soo yeah.

Hello

mucho has been happening, i'm not gonna lie.
connor's trying to be nice again. am i sure? no.
he dropped round a parcel of all our old 'memories' today, like pictures and postcards etc.
did it hurt?
not really, he's free to do as he pleases.
he dumped alex this evening: kissed Emily Packmore when he was 'very very drunk'
that's not an excuse tbh.
umm. matt and i have been getting on really well recently: we've become a lot better friends, and it feels good tbh :)

andy and i are doing well; we talked about him giving me more space like i needed for GCSEs etc, so that's all sorted :)
had my first exam yesterday: R.E. went okay i suppose; for some reason answered question 4, when my head told me to do question 5.. stupid shit pen.

umm... not sure what else to write tbh...
but yeah, also, Freddie's not emailing me back.
twat.
everyone said that's what he's like, but i never listened..
I'm going to write him an email tomorrow i think, if i have the time.
eurgh.

Yours with love,
Hannah xxx

a perfect day, ruined. AGAIN

Hello

I swear connor enjoys making my life hell.
I have a perfect day with my perfect boyfriend
and then a lovely evening with my girlies,
and connor comes along and tramples it.
calls me a bitch.
calls andy every name under the sun.
eurgh.
and now he's sent me a picture of his self-harmed arm.
WHAT THE FUCK?!

i hate the word, but i mean honestly: CUNT.

he thinks i want him to die.
i don't.
but i want him to leave me the fuck alone.

Yours with fuckingpissedoffness,
Hannah xxx

Oh happy days.

Hello

I
LOVE
ANDY
JUPP.

that is all :)

he's SO amazing :)
we had the best time, and know what else? he bought me the NICEST necklace just because he loves me.. not as an apology, not because it was a special occasion; just because he loves me.

makes me happy happy happy :)

SO much :):):):):):):):):):):)

we had the nicest evening possible.. relaxed, had fun, had a laugh.. just was so nice. AND he stayed for dinner, which was nice, cos he never has before :)
simple things like that make me happy :)

Yours with SOOOmuchlove,
Hannah xxx

PS. my great auntie betty died 2 nights ago.. i told evie and jess, but i didn't wanna make a big fuss, so i called andy as soon as i found out and had a cry and it's all okay now i think.. i also think i'm going to the funeral next Friday.. :/ x

Hello,

so i'm thinking that i haven't done enough revision.
so here's the plan.
this weekend coming i have a 4 day weekend.
Friday; revision.
Saturday: matt's house
Sunday: revision and keep fit class thing with mum
Monday: Andy and then maybe charlie's party thing in the evening.

and then revision EVERY DAY during the week for at least 2-3 hours every evening.
apart from wednesday, when i am seeing andy, so i will only be able to do about 1 hour.

sounds like a plan (y)

so yeah, things with andy?
A-MAZ-ING
:)
i mean like, wow
:) makes me happyyy :)

i think it's getting Matt down though.. i don't wanna hurt him cos he's become such a good friend to me recently and hurting him is not a good thing :/

anyway...

Yours with lovelovelove,
Hannah xxx

not sure..

Hello

i'm in a bad mood.
i don't know why.
i should be over the moon.
but i'm not.
andy came over and yeah... :L
umm
yeah.
no, not what you're thinking.
but yeah, basically, i'm now stressed or depressed or something :/
i dunno...

Yours with confusion,
Hannah xxx

ouch.

Hello

got my second lobes done today :)
bloody hurts.
Andy said he didn't like more than one ear piercing.
fuck him, i like them :L

Yours with love,
Hannah xxx

i. am. a. dick.

Hello

i told andy a lie.
not a big one, but a lie all the same.
i told him i only put 3 kisses to matt. he saw one of his texts today and there was about 6 on there. sounds silly, but he got quite pissed off.
i don't usually send Matt that many kisses. it's usually 3/4 max. he was just upset and i felt bad :/
i know it doesn't sound like that much of a big deal, but its the fact that i lied which is the main thing.
eurgh i'm a twat.
but i was forgivven. and i love him more than ever now.
so i'm NEVER lying to him again.
not even about anything small.
nothing.
no more lies, because they're bad :/

Yours with general-twatness,
Hannah xxx

:)

Hello

so yeah, Andy asked me out; i said yesss :)
i felt bad for Matt though :/
and then connor decided to have the BIGGEST go at me possible, saying that he hopes i'm miserable and that even though he said before 'i just want you to be happy' which i AM, he's like 'i hope andy drops down dead.' and 'i'm going to put him in hospital'.
yeah, because that makes him a big tough man. Andy doesn't use violence. thank god. cos connor scared me when i was with him, incase he got angry and swung for me, which he said he'd never do, but tbh, you just don't know these days...

anyway :)

Yours with love,
Hannah xxx

Oh happy days :)

Hello

Dear my life,

What the heck is up with you atm?
Seriously, you're being good to me.. this isn't like you. I'm not complaining, I'm just asking you not to stop being nice because it makes me happy.
you've given me andy, and matt.
thing is, there's a problem with Matt. he likes me and asked me out last night. now usually i wouldn't complain, but he's one of those people you don't wanna let down. it's not that i don't like him, i do, he's a really good friend, but i don't think i see him like that and i really really like Andy, but i don't wanna let Matt down. I know, 'i'm going to have to', but when? I told him I'd think on it, but until Andy choses to make us more official, then I'm gonna keep 'thinking' :/

Thanks most of the time, Life,
Regards
Hannah.





Yours with love,
Hannah xxx

keepin' it real.

Hello

connor's kissed someone else.
do i mind?
not really.

i kissed Andy in Brighton yesterday, too.
lots :)
would i say yes if he asked me out?
yes, i would.
is he going to ask me out?
who knows.

but yeah, connor gets annoyed about andy, and i'm totally nice about Madi, and he's like 'i care about you and andy' it's like well stick it, cos i don't want you ruining this, tbh, esp if you like someone else at the same time.
if he loves me, he'll leave her alone, but tbh, i couldn't care less.
i think it might be easier if i just kick him outa my life for good tbh...

but yeahh, Andy makes me well happy :)
walking
talking
cuddling
kissing
driving
joking
'singing'

was good :)
seeing him again on Friday :)

Yours with love,
Hannah xxx

the BEST day of my life! (L)

Hello

OMG RIGHT
basically, last night, (3rd april) Evie and I went to go and see Brian Fortuna do his dancing at the Capitol. it was AMAZING! he kept winking at us. and then OMG. he came down the stairs where we were sitting (second row from the front) and offered his hand to me (whilst singing :S) and then pulled me up, and the lyrics said 'kiss me' so he pulled me towards him and gave me A KISS ON THE CHEEK! :D:D:D:D
my life is OFFICIALLY complete! oh my GOD. i am SO happy. And everyone in the audience was like 'Awwwwhh' and then he took me back to my seat and was holding my hand while i sat down.
I LOVE HIM.
oh my goddddddddd.
i am NEVER going to forget this. and i WISH we could have taken photos because that would have been AMAZING!
wow, he's SO hot in person too. I rang like, everyone and was screaming down the phone like 'AHHH BRIAN KISSED ME!!!!!' <3(L)
Love him.

but yeah, in other news, Connor still likes me; that was awkward round his house when he texted me telling me he wanted to kiss me, and then he texts me the next day asking if i wanna go to town.. urr NO! he tells me it was awkward the night before; it'd be even worse by ourselves the next day!

and awwh, Andy - what a babe :) he's so lush and he actually cheers me up so much :)
Evie and Nikki seem to think it's dead cute :P

but yeahh
BRIAN
FORTUNA
KISSED
ME.

Yours with theBESTdayofmylifeness,
Hannah xxx

P.S. :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Blogged.

Hello

FRENCH
SPEAKING
TEST
TOMORROW

fuck my life tbh.

eurgh.

but yeah, i'm happy with life atm tbh :)

i don't know what else to write tbh.

i think i should just shutup at go to bed early so i'm refreshed for tomorrow's fantastic frech test (n)

Eurgh..


Yours with unfrenchness,
Hannah xxx

Happy birthday to me..

Hello

2 days after my birthday today.

I've got my belly pierced. yes i love it :D
i split with connor this morning.
am i happy?
Yes.
I know that sounds mean, but tbh, it's a weight off my shoulders which was just getting me down.
He still likes me, but tbh, i don't want him back.
i'm sorry it's harsh. but it's true.

I also love Mr Clay :D

and i'm soo tired.
i've been talking to Andy an awful lot recently.
i suppose that's a good thing :)
he cheers me up sooo much :D
4 hours i was on the phone to him on my birthday! :O

Oh well.

Yours with belly-piercingness,
Hannah xxx

Update.

Hello

8 days guys. 8 days!
guess what else?
I'M GROWING MY NAILS AND IT'S GOING WELL!
guess what else, else!
I'M ATTEMPTING A DIET, AGAIN!
it's not going so well :L

Connor's apparently really frustrated atm.
I don't know why i'm not more concerned.. i think it's because i have a lot on my plate atm as well, and by taking in his problems as well is just effort.

i'd let you know what other things have been happening, but with the risk of certain people reading them, i won't tell you :)
sorryy (L)

ummm...
tbh, not a lot happening.
but there is, i just can't type it all up.

Meh.
fuck it.

Yours with stress,
Hannah xxx

oh my lord.

Hello

Eurgh.
it's one of those evenings.
(n)

Yours with badness,
Hannah xxx

Hello

yeah so connor and i had a large argument AGAIN the other night.
he came over again to try and say sorry, but i didn't forgive him.
and then i went round his yesterday and it's all sorted and good now.

he's given up Sunday football i think now, so it means i can see him for longer on Sundays :)

i'm babysitting my brother atm; slightly boring, but y'know :/


Yours with tiredness,
Hannah xxx

all is well.

Hello

:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)

Connor came over 15 minutes ago with a bunch of flowers and some chocolate to say sorry (L)

all is well in Hannah land :)


Yours with lovelovelove,
Hannah xxx

omg.

Hello

connor's a dick.
it's official.
WHY is he with me if he prefers football over me?!
he tells me that he's not going to football this evening, and then he gets in a mood when i say to him that he said he wouldn't go.
and then he cancels football, and then arranges to go an hour later anyway!
eurgh.
he hates spending time with me.
if he loved me like he said he does, he would come over intead of/straight after football with a bunch of flowers and a big apology prepared.

dickhead.

Yours with dickness,
Hannah xxx

Hello

if he doesn't want to see me all day then why doesn't he just say so?
he'd much rather play football. its blates obvious.
why doesn't he just tell me the truth instead of making me feel like shit for him doing something he doesn't wanna do?

eurgh.

men.

Yours with eurghness,
Hannah xxx

last night

Hello

last night was a blast and a half :)
there was 12 of us round Hannah's for her birthday party, playing games such as 'I have never..' and pulling names out of a hat an acting them out :) funnn :) and we ate loads so now i'm like owww my tummy :L
but it was so worth it :)

i think i'm not going to Lily's party tonight anymore, because we might not know many people going, so i think i'm going to go out for a meal with connor instead, which'll be nice :)

connor wrote on his blog that we're 'alright'. i like to think we're better than alright. Admittingly yes, we have argued a lot more recently, but that's because we always argue and we hold completely different ideas of what the world should be like and we're completely different people to each other. and yes, we're going through some personal troubles, but, like he said, we'll get through it because we love each other.

I've got a maths mock next thursday, so i've got to concentrate a lot of today on revising for that :/ but this evening should tak the weight off my shoulders :) plus i'm really tired, so going out should wake me up, and give me a reason to wear my new shoes :)

i really need to buy a new dress :/ i might wander into town this afternoon and go on a dress hunt for a bit - a nice black dress would be good :) or whatever...

or i'll go next weekend.. who knows.
but it's a WELL nice day today! i don't wanna waste it, so i might just wander in by myself if no one wants to come with me..

ahh well. sorry this is such a long post, i'm sort of thinking out loud..

Yours with tiredness,
Hannah xxx

i'll explain.

Hello

so the doctor told me to get a pregnancy test, just in case.
i'm not pregnant; it's okay.
but i think i know what the problem is. but i don't want to enclose it in my blog. it's kinda personal. but when i find out, i might let you know..
so yeah :/

that's all, tbh.
it's hannah's party tomorrow :) looking forward to thattt XD

Yours with :/ness,
Hannah xxx

for those who may like to know..

Hello

i was off school again today,
i know i'm off a lot, but i haven't been in ages.

this is because I'm bleeding in between periods.
i know that might sounds gross; it is. but i hate being at school with it so my dad and i got into an argument about it and i refused to leave the house so now my parents are in a mood about it and i've got an appointment at the doctor's at 3:15. it is now 1:15.

i hope it's nothing bag, but things like this ALWAYS happen to me. no one else, just me.
eurgh.

Yours with crapness,
Hannah xxx

we fight, we move on.

Hello

yep, once again, connor and i had an argument. but it was only about his football or something silly like that. we made up in the end - that's what's so great about our relationship now - we can really talk about things. silly arguments like that just show how close we are.

and tbh, i couldn't be happier with him. Yes, we fight every now and then, but we make up and are happy together :)
i was a bitch to say that we couldn't have a future together - of course we could. we would just have to work our arses off to get there.

I had a really nice day with him today though :)

wow, i love him :)

and also, i sent my invitations out on facebook for my party, today :)

Yours with lovelovelove,
Hannah xxx

tbh, i don't know how i feel.

Hello

Benoit has a new girlfriend.

how do i feel?

i have no idea.

Yours with dunnoness,
Hannah xxx

who am i kidding?

Hello

I'm in a bad mood.
not with anyone in particular, although it did all steam from my parents buying everyone else curry and not me, even though i did ask VERY nicely.
i'm also taking out my bad mood on Connor. I shouldn't. but i am.
I love him, but we're 2 kids sharing some stupid dream about having a future together. we both want it to happen, but we don't have anything to work with. Neither of us have a job so we can't afford rent on a flat, my parents don't want me having sex till i'm 17 (as my dad talked to be about earlier) and we'd argue all the time.
I told him all of this in text tonight, just now, actually. and he argued and said that we WOULD have a life together. and I said no we wouldn't. I'd end up staying with my parents until i'm 60 because no one would want a fat, ugly whore, who lost her virginity too early. I'd also end up working in sainbury's.
I just don't think Connor understands how much I rely on him. For example, today, he should have offered to ring me. but he didn't. He just allowed me to go to bed with just saying 'Night xxx'. I would have offered to ring him had he been like that with me. He hasn't quite grasped what it's like for me - I'm a teenage girl in a serious relationship. It's stressful and I have a lot of work to do atm. I love him, but he needs to help me! All i wanted was a phone call for goodness' sake!
He won't even read this, so he'll still be in a mood with me in the morning because I've ruined the dream that we shared, and he can't even read the reasons why i'm in a bad mood. it's not with him. i just fecking hate life atm.
It's not my fault. I just can't believe something that I know can't happen in the state that things are in.

so, until tomorrow. or some later date,

Yours with badmoodness,
Hannah xxx

Dear blog,

Hello

I know everyone has their problems.
I'm not denying that.
but i swear to god, the same problem i have keeps coming back and back.
it's not friendships, or connor or anything like that.
it's a physical thing.
omg. i actually think i have some serious problem.
i'll see how it is tomorrow, and then have to go to the doctor's again if it's bad.

anyway,

Yours with bleughness,
Hannah xxx

Yeahyeah

Hello

yes, i know. it's been a while.
I've spent most of half term with my lovely boyfriend :) it was wonderful up Noooorth ;)

we spent half the time on the Wii and we went rifle shooting and then the lads went quad biking as well.
Rhianna, Mark and I went and played crazy golf. (I won :L)
but yeahh, we shared a reallllly nice room and had a lovely bathroom as well.
I really wanna go back. and it's weird not having connor around nearly every second of the day. I miss him.
It's times like these when i realllly think that Connor and I could have a real future together. And that, if he asked me to move in with him when he got a job and I got one as well and I was in college etc as well, that I would say yes.

i've realised now, that actually, i don't think i could get bored of him anymore. I'm past that stage of not having anything to do. It's the different things like going on holiday together like that that keep us together and keep us strong.
I'm not even joking, i love him so much more than i've ever loved anything.
He's like one of my best friends as well as my boyfriend and to be honest, he makes me so happy :)

know what else? we bought matching trackies. oh yes we did :)
and we had a lovely meal out and valentines day was lovely :) i was given flowers, a CD and some chocolates.
omg the amount of shit i ate then was inbelieveable!
i need to cut down again i think :L

but yeahh, that holiday was full of a lot of new experiences ;) :)

Last night i was over at Nikki's with Evie and Jess :) was a laugh.
got chinese, watched Jeepers Creepers and Mean Girls as well.
i fell asleep first, as usual.
I'm thinking a fairly early night tonight!

Niiight!!!

Yours with loveloveandmorelove,
Hannah xxx

Up Noooorth :)

Hello

so yeah, i'm in Lincolnshire :)
i looove it XD

and everything's good so yeahh.

my cat called me this evening, drinking milk. it was fun :)

anyway, im off ;)

Yours with LOOOVE,
Hannah xxx

Jonglage

Hello

Evie's living with me today and tomorrow :)
it's gooooood ;)

and women in black is on friday
and i'm going to Belton Woods on Saturdayyyy :D
cannot WAITTTT :):):)


Yours with goodness,
Hannah xxx

Prom dress?

Hello

http://www.promroyalty.com/midnight-blue-rimini-midnight-prom-dresses-p-53.html

that's the address to my (hopeful) prom dress.
i love it (dark blue, btw)

i love this pink one as well, but it's too expensive:

http://www.promroyalty.com/light-pink-bella-light-pink-prom-dress-p-16.html

soo yeahh..

:)

Yours with promness,
Hannah xxx

So i've been coming up with imaginary scenarios in my head, for example, i died, but I could see how everyone was reacting. i also thought about what would happen if i KNEW i was going to die. who would i tell? what would i say to people? who would i apoogise to? who would i take the opportunity to punch round the face? (not thinking of anyone in particular..*cough*miss gammon*cough*)

basically, i thought about myself. and i thought that actually, i'm hideous. people say 'Hannah! you're so vain! you have so many pictures of yourself!'
wanna know why i have so many pictures?
to make myself feel good because i want people to think that i'm pretty even though on the inside i feel like a total fuck ugly ogre.
i'm not after attention, so please don't think i am.

i just can't seem to help myself in anything i do.
i tell myself to lose weight: i can't.
i tell myself to sort myself out: i can't.

in general, i fail at life.

on the upside, i think i love mr hoare :L

but yeahh.

I'm going on holiday to Lincolnshire with Connor & fam on saturday :) should be soo good.
and on Friday Evie and I have the Women in Black trip in London.. not sure whether to be excited or worried :S

I'm not sure what else to write in here today. It sounds like i've just droned on and on..
but i'm not trying to complain. i generally am annoyed.

also, i don't know if i've written this on here, but i'm going to the 'doctor's' for my social anxiety thing.
(for those who don't know):
- I can't go out without thinking that everyone is looking at me or laughing
- I can't meet new people for too long without thinking that they're judging me
- I can't see Connor's friends because i'm afraid they'll take the piss or hate me or laugh
- I get paranoid when i'm in big groups that different people within the group are talking about me
- I get paranoid about Connor - that he's going to hurt me again
- Any girl that talks to him i get worried about, automatically.

so yeah, that's why i need to go to the shrink's.
please don't think i'm a weirdo.

anyway, i'm going.
I'm rather tired and should be going to bed soon..

Yours with unsureness,
Hannah xxx

here goes.

Hello

right, well i've decided a diet is not the best way forward.
however i WILL watch what i eat.
i'll try and be good, without starving myself (!)

also, i thought everything was shit yesterday. it wasn't. it's fine now.
connor and i had a mini dispute earlier, but it's all patched up now :)

i have ALSO just had a FREEZING cold shower because my dumbarse parents don't know how to turn on the bloody hot water! :@

but yeah..

I'm well tired.
going to purposely 'forget' my P.E. kit tomorrow to miss out on double P.E. :)

Yours with tiredness-but-also-love,
Hannah xxx

Hey fatty bom bom..

Hello

...want another cream cake?

yes please. because i need to be fatter than i am already.

eurgh. fml

Yours with fatness,
Hannah xxx

FML.

Hello


WHY
CAN'T
I
LOSE
WEIGHT!?


seriously. i say i'm going to be good, and then i fuck up!
i was doing fine for agesss!
maybe i'm going to have to go back to doing whatever i did before and start actually being careful.

then that's what i'll do.

Yours with forfuckssakeness,
Hannah xxx

History

Hello

you're going to be my revision help for History :)
brb lemme get my notes...

basically, I'm just going to write things to you, and you have to listen intently, got it?
good.

i'll begin.

1931 - Japanese invasion of Manchuria
1933 - Hitler became Chancellor of Germany
1934 - Mussolini stops Hitler from uniting with Austria
1935 - he introduced conscription and rearmament
- the Saar voted to be part of germany again (it belonged to the League for 15 years, and was allowed to choose whether to be part of France or germany)
1936 - March: Hitler marched his troops into the Rhineland. (Tear up the Treaty of Versailles)
- Spanish civil war began (Hitler sent planes over to Franko to help him)
- Rome-Berlin act. (Hitler and Mussolini agreeing to help the other if they go to war)
1938 - March - Hitler marched his troops into Austria - they welcomed him - Anschluss (Germany and Austria uniting)
- September - Chamberlain appeased Hitler, and gave him the Sudetenland - made it easier for invading Czechoslovakia
1939 - March - Hitler marched his troops into the rest of Czechoslovakia (easier for invasion of Poland)
- August - Hitler and Stalin made a pact not to attack each other. Their secret pact was to attack Poland from either side and defend themselves from Britain and France should they attack. They would share Poland.
- September - Hitler invades Poland. 2 days later, Britain declares war on Germany.

Saar
Conscription and rearmament
Rhineland
Austria
Munich crisis

Czechoslovakia
USSR (when britain promised germany they would go to war if they invaded poland)
Poland


THANKS FOR LISTENING :)


Yours with boredness,
Hannah xxx

I'M SO FUCKING FAT.

Hello

I HATE MY BODY.
SO FUCKING MUCH.
I'M NOT GOING TO EAT. EVER. SERIOUSLY. TOMORROW, I SHALL EAT DINNER ONLY.

FML.

but i'm happy with connor :D:D:D
still no arguments :)

and he bought me a reallllly cute teddy :D
i love him.

and the poetry live trip was a laughhhh :L
love john agard :L

Yours with fatness-but-also-with-love,
Hannah xxx

(L)

Hello

i love him.
he's perfect.
he's my baby.
i'm SOO glad i got back with him.
we haven't had one SINGLE argument yet! (yn)
literally, i don't care what people think.

I LOVE CONNOR PASCOE.

:D

Yours with LOOOOOOVE,
Hannah xxx

:)

I've been pretty good today, actually.

2 glasses of apple & rasberry juice
1 stawberries and cream frappachino from starbucks (SOOO nice!)
some water

10 grapes
1 apple
1 packet of kellogs bite things
1 portion of bangers and mash and beans

:)

it's all good.

Yours with coldness,
Hannah xxx

:)

Hello

he makes me happyyyyy :)
and i love him, and i'm going on holiday with him and i can't WAIT :)

Yours with love,
Hannah xxx

I'm fucking useless

Hello

i'm useless. i eat a lot.
tomorrow, i shall not eat. except for dinner.

i'm well happy now i'm with connor :) and it's kinda shite when people are like 'whyy?! he's a twat!' and i'm like 'actually, he HAS been. but he's proved to be lovely recently, and i love him :)' and it gets me down when people have a go and are like 'AGAIN?!' it's like 'yes actually. again'

Yours with mostly-happyness,
Hannah xxx

Shitttttt.

Hello

this weekend has been full of shit. i have eaten nothing but calories.

but nikki and i found some nice turkish guys :L and i found that blond guy who kept smiling at me, and nikki said he was a gimp :L

and yeahh, saw connor today...
i'm in a but of a pickle with him.

i'll come out and say it: Yes. I love him still.
but i'm afraid about what people are going to say.
something like 'I KNEW IT!' or 'BUT HE HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE!'
yep. i know he did. i hated him for it. but i'm pretty much over it.
I love him. i HAVE to get over it.

Yours with confuseness,
Hannah xxx

I hate my life today.

Hello

fuck the world.

1) Miss Morgan wouldn't let us off P.E.
2) During P.E. i hurt my leg
3) I didn't understand maths at ALL today
4) My french horn lesson was shit and a waste of time
5) I had double science and an ISA
6) My mum suddenly changed her mind 15 mins before connor was die to come round that she didn't want him round cos she was running late at work, and didn't want another repeat of 'last time' (mirror incident).
7) I got pissed off, and walked out of the house without telling her, and met with Connor.
8) She phoned me 30 mins later and asked where the hell i was and said if i wasn't back by 6:00 i'll be in 'BIG trouble' and hung up.
9) I came home at 5:45 and have ignored her since. I don't think she cares, and if she yells, I shall simply leave the house or swear non-stop at her, and rebel even more.

FUCK. MY. LIFE.

I shall keep you updated, incase anything changes.

Yours with I-FUCKING-HATE-HERness,
Hannah xxx

I'm a twat

Hello

it's not day 15.
it's day 16.
forget i'm alive :L

Yours with douchebagness,
Hannah xxx

Day 15

Hello


FUCK YOU ALL, COS I'M BACK ON TRACK! :)

Yours with stick-itness,
Hannah xxx

Day 14 (if it even counts)

Hello

i may just NOT eat.
i think that's what i'll do :)

Yes.
i will do that!

good plan, captain :)

Yours with boredness,
Hannah xxx

Gay 13?

Hello

i cbf to write out what i ate today. i had a takeaway curry cos it's my brother's birthday. otherwise i've been fine :)

i'll write tomorrow

Yours with lazyness,
Hannah xxx

Day 13

Hello

1 glass of apple juice
1 diet coke
1 glass of grape and peach juice
1 glass of water
1 nutella Shake Away (SOO worth the calories!)

2 weetabix in milk
1 KFC meal (:$)
1 portion of roast dinner
1 apple
3 pieces of gum

not fantastically healthy, but there we go.
tomorrow i shall have a energy filled breakfast, and then not eat much for lunch and then have dinner :)
back into the swing of things ;)

Yours with i'm-not-doing-wellness,
Hannah xxx

Day 12

Hello

sorry, i had a really late night last night. but i ate fairly healthily apart from the pizza dinner ;)

today:

1 glass of orange juice
1 hot chocolate
1 cup of tea
some water

1 bowl of cornflakes
3 small pieces of bread
1/2 a slice of lemon drizzle cake
1 portion of chicken stew and potato
1 slice of treacle tart

omg
i feel well sick, too.

i'm going off track :/

btw, the ballet (rom and jul) was AMAZING :)

Yours with off-trackness,
Hannah xxx

Day 10

Hello

I need to be hit with several large bats.

1 glass of apple juice
1 cup of tea
some water

1 weetabix and bran flakes in milk
1 youghurt
1 panini
1 apple
1 cookie
1 donut
1 portion of sausages, potato and peas
10 gummy sweets

KILL ME NOW. i'm meant to be good! but my mum keeps buying unhealthy stuff!! :(

i SHALL be good. however, tomorrow evening could be hard. but I WILL eat well tomorrow.
promise promise promise.

Yours with ashamedness,
Hannah xxx

Random

Hello

I also thought i should update you on events too, instead of just my food.

connor and i are 'friends' again now, though he keeps trying to prove that he loves me..
i'm not complaining :P
but it's sweet.

I'm also going to Belton Woods with him again in February.. should be good :)

Biology exam tomorrow. Shitting myself. I'll fail, but I'll try! :)

Umm there's not much else atm..

my dad's home, though. I actually missed him.
and i've also been given permission for a 16th birthday party! though i'm not allowed it at home .. :/
not surprised though.
and on Friday, jess and I are going to see Rom and Jul! :)
should be awesome.
and Saturday my nan is coming down and my fam and evie's fam are going to the cinema, and then i'm sleeping at evie's (i think)

Sunday is Chemistry revision.

Monday is chemistry exam and my brother's birthday..

on the 30th i'm getting my hair trimmed and highlighted by my hairdresser :)
can't waittttt.

Yours with happyness,
Hannah xxx

Day 9

Hello

PLEASE don't kill me. i've eaten loads of shite today.

1 glass of cranberry juice
1 hot chocolate
1 cup of tea
1 cup of apple juice
lots of water

1 weetabix with a few bran flakes in milk
1 portion of chicken curry
1 ice lolly
3 squares of brownie
1 cookie
1 (small) portion of spag bol
2 dates

so yes. i'm feeling VERY fat. don't worry about that.
tomorrow, i shall have a good breakfast for energy for the bloge exam, and then have nothing for lunch except for maybe an apple, and then i shall have dinner and nothing else.
and i shall drink only 1 glass of apple juice in the morning, then only tea and water.

Yours in determined-and-unhealthyness,
Hannah xxx

Day 8

Hello

today:

1 cup of tea
1 glass of cranberry juice
1 fruit shoot
lots of water

1 weetabix in milk
1 satsuma
1 apple
2 special K bars
1 portion of (very nice) roast dinner

I'M BACK IN THE GAME, BABY! :)

and my daddy's home :)

Yours with backontrackness,
Hannah xxx

Day 7! :)

Hello

wow, it's been a whole week of (fairly) healthyness!
i've NEVER lasted this long on a diet before! :):)
(BE PROUD OF ME! :L)
I'm not exactly religous about the diet though, tbh :L

today's food:

1 glass of orange juice
2 cups of tea (love Mr Skinner :L)
1 glass of lemonade (brother told me it was water 8-))
Lots of water

1 weetabix in milk
1 pack of kellogs bites things
3 biscuits (once again, mr skinner :L)
1 hot cross bun
1 portion of chicken pie and beans

so yeah, not too bad.. but not my best :/
week 2 WILL be better. and i'm going to buy some scales at some point, to start making sure i'm losing weight, and this isn't all for nothing.

Yours with an-itchy-neckness,
Hannah xxx

Day 6

Hello

today I have eaten VERY unhealthily, because connor fed me lots this evening.
tomorrow, i WILL be better :)

1 glass of orange juice
1 glass of sprite
1 bag of stupid baked heathy crisps
5 slices of domino's pizza
1 ice cream sundae (wowwww it was good!)

but yeah. :)

Yours with unhealthyness,
Hannah xxx

Day 5

Hello

Sorry i didn't write yesterday- evie was round so i couldn't.
but this is what i had yesterday:


4 cups of tea
1 glass of diet coke
1 weetabix in milk
1 bag of (low fat baked) crisps
1 small slice of coffee and walnut cake
1 portion of chicken curry

so yeah, i ate a lot. but i'm going round connor's for dinner later, so i'm going to eat LOADS :S
it's just to talk, for those who are wondering.
but yeah, i'm not going to eat ANYTHING all day until this evening.
so i've have a glass of orange juice, and that'll be all till later :)

Yours with nervousness,
Hannah xxx

Day 4

Hello

today, i have not been anywhere near as hungry as i usually am.

I've had:

1 cup of tea
1 bottle of flavoured water (i was in sainsburgerz and VERY dehydrated)
1 weetabix in milk
1 fairy cake
1 portion of spag bol (leftover :/)
1 small piece of baguette, which wasn't very nice

completely off-topic, but i'm so glad we've had 3 (practically) snow days! Matthew's got the day off on Monday, too! Lucky..

Michael came round today, too, which was fun :)

I'm pretty bored now though, tbh. and it's meant to snow more on Saturday night and during the day on Sunday :/

Yours with i-think-this-is-going-well-ness,
Hannah xxx

Day 3

Hello

i've not been so healthy today, again. but like i said, i ate breakfast!

1 weetabix in milk
2 cups of tea
1 glass of squash
2 fairy cakes (homemade by moi, and bloody good!)
1 portion of spag bol

et voila :)

c'est tout!

until tomorrow, i guess...

btw, 3 SNOW DAYS! :D:D

Yours with feelingbetterness,
Hannah xxx

Day 2

Hello

i've eaten more today than yesterday, and not very healthily, and it sounds silly, but the diets already given me headaches and i feel kinda achy :/

here's what i ate/drank:

5 cups of tea
1 glass of lemonade
1 mocha
3 ladels of soup
1 piece of toast
1 portion of curry
1 (very) small piece of chocolate pudding with half a spoon of ice cream

so yeah. i ate more, but if i hadn't eaten that chocolate pudding, i may have starved from starvation.. :S

i'll be better tomorrow! promise!
and i've taken the advice of my mother, and am going to eat breakfast - 1 weetabix in milk.

Yours with day-two-ness,
Hannah xxx

Day 1

Hello

today, i have eaten:

2 apples
1 satsuma
1 mini sausage roll
1 piece of bread (yes, i know. CARBS! lol)
1 bowl of vegetable soup
1/4 of a sausage pikied from my brother's plate :)
fuck loads of water and a cuppa tea

know what else?
i'm not even that hungry :)

Yours with bring-on-day-two-ness,
Hannah xxx

new me.

Hello

it's taken a while, but i've decided on my New Years Relolution.

I'm going on the Atkin's diet.

i've got fat everywhere. my face, my stomach, my legs, my back, my hips!
EVERYWHERE.

so, from tomorrow, I can only eat healthy stuff. no carbs.
no bread
no pasta
no butter
not much meat
no chocolate
nothing sweet
no cereals
no potato based products
no yoghurt

fuck all, basically.
what can i eat?

vegetables
fruit
sometimes chicken
some nuts

i think that's all :L

and all i can drink is water.

Friends - make SURE i stick to this!!!
i'm relying on you!
call me fat, if you must.

WISH ME LUCK!

Yours with already-hungryness,
Hannah xxx

Happy New Year! and all of that...

Hello

well, as you know, New Year's day was the other day, and i stupidly agreed to go round Duncan's house (connor's brother) and swearing never to see or speak to Connor again, seeing as he had sex with my friend, kissed another one and then smashed my mirror in a fit of annoyance. But yeah, so I went round, and ended up basically, spending all evening with Connor and Connor's friend James, who is i loovely btw lol. But yeah, i was a little bit drunk, or tipsy. which ever you prefer, and i may have kissed Connor.

I know. And i've been regretting it ever since. And now Connor thinks something's changed and we have to be friends again. I said no, of course. not sure how long i'll hold up. but I have to try and be strong... Never mind. things happen, so i've literally just told him about a little incident that happened after we broke up, involving another boy, and i'm seeing how he'll react. I think he'll be a bit pissed off, but that's the idea - I want him to stop pestering so we can both move on with our lives.

Ahh well.

Happy New Year, readers.

Yours with a cough,
Hannah xxx